这次的农历新年很特别.大部分的人都很勤力地更新FB的讯息,上传照片,大部分时间更是通过FB来联系.看来在科技猖狂的世界,当朋友离自己越来越远的时候,手机已经无法拉回那段距离了.

我觉得我是个脑袋想很多的人,不过想得比较偏黑,仿佛终日不见黑暗似的.可是提起头来,我并不会消沉地想自杀还是伤害自己.

我只是在无人的时候,会偷偷让眼泪等雨一起落下来.周杰伦教的.

消沉一阵子,我会觉得自己好笨,为什么要坚持一些无法坚持的事情?事情过去了,可是石头一抛下来,心中的涟漪又出现了.要放弃的时候,又无法狠下心.

这是无法勉强的事吧.当两个世界已经没有交错点了,你所做的一切是很多余的,而且没有意义的.对方看不看得见都好,做这么多其实是让自己看而已.

以前我可以为了别人放弃所有的东西都无所谓,但是我没种,不舍得放弃,勇敢做出决定,所以现在困在一个很艰难的路.看着周围的人不断地改变,难免会担心自己能不能撑到最后.

也许时机对了,就奋身一击吧.

如女王所说,对自己,就要好一点!

因此我毫不犹豫地买了Asus Eee Pad Transformer Prime给自己.我知道我的储蓄不多,也知道没有它世界还是一样,不过我知道我会非常喜欢它.我会不知觉地改变我的生活习惯,找到我的人生正在缺少什么.

因为方便携带,所以我将会想得更多,也会写得更多.

受到博客的影响后,半桶水的我,又再一次寻找新的液体,活跃地写垃圾了.这次要寻找的是我真正的兴趣.

说说新年的趣事吧.

我的侄儿不到三岁,平时很少接触小朋友,今天碰见许多同龄亲戚,性格显露得更明显.他不断尝试接触其中一个小孩子,拿了他喜欢的玩具给对方,也想把自己最喜欢的游戏教对方玩,用自己独特的方式与别人互动,真可爱.可惜我没听到他们的对话.

反观我们这些大人们,遇见新朋友的时候是否会像我的侄儿一样,分享自己喜欢的事物,教对方自己擅长的知识?

祝大家新年进步,万事如意.

也祝在另一个世界的你,万事称心如意,身体健康,龙年快快乐乐.

Posted with Prime

I should write a review about this nice and beautiful tablet.

有时候就算你喊得多么大声，对方也未必听得见。

可是就算听见了然后他转身丢石头砸你的头，你也希望他听见。

这就是笨蛋。

世界就是需要更多笨蛋的存在。

我以为这个世界还找得到真诚。原来不是。

人类已经进化到无论大家用什么方法联系，都能保持着那虚伪的容颜的地步。

我已经不能再相信任何人，任何承诺，任何希望，任何情义，任何事物。

不可以有恻隐之心，不可以有豪迈之心，不可以谦虚卑微。

我以为我知道很多，原来我对周围的变化一丁点也不知道。我只是骗自己，终日胡思乱想，妄想。

我是不甘心，还是嫉妒？

我知道，强制压缩悲伤的心，最终只会毁灭自己。

我并不要想得那么负面，可是我无法阻止自己憎恨这个丑陋的世界。

我觉得，其实我只是憎恨自己。

我要力量，我要财富，我要全世界。

也许我只需要原谅自己。

原谅什么？我也不知道。

今年我不要再害怕了。

因为我的软弱，因为我的妄想，因为我的自负，因为我的无知，因为我的幼稚，我失去了所有。

我没有什么可以失去了。

我要做我自己，做我要做的事，说我要说的话。

纯熟发泄之帖，可忽视。

In case you do not know, Fallout is a famous role-playing PC game back in 1997. It is about the destroyed world after nuclear war on October 23, 2077. The lands and seas were contaminated with radiation and a lot of people died.

But of course, some of them survived.

Some got severe burns and radiation until their skins started to rot and they looked like zombies or ghouls.

Some got mutated and became super mutants, looked like orcs and strong like them.

Some survived as human beings, and struggled on the surface of Earth.

And some hid underground shelters, known as vaults, free of radiation.

This is where all the story begins.

Fallout 1 and 2 by Interplay and Black Isle are turn-based, but a huge change is done on Fallout 3 by Bethesda Softworks. Fallout 3 has merged its unique VATS with first person shooting, with an option of third person view. You can still listen to Enclave radio station with all the good oldies (I tried, and died so many times in the wasteland because of it).

So, how does it feel playing Fallout 3? With a straight forward opening and first person view, you learn immediately who you are, where you are and what you are. The moment I step out of the vault and return to the ground, I really feel amazed and triumphed, mesmerized by the beautiful art of Fallout 3. Not even a single grass is simply made. Everything in the game looks so real, as if I am living alive inside.

And what makes this game so special is it offers you totally freedom! It does not tell you how to go to your destination, it does not care at all. You escape from Vault 101, and you just have to figure out yourself how to survive in the wasteland.

What makes this game best is it does not define right or wrong. If you are sensitive enough you will soon learn that playing such game enables you to understand yourself easier because game systems like this reflect your thinking and perceptions.

So what Fallout 3 has shown me?

I am a perfectionist. I wish to do everything successfully and I dislike failure. I would rather train myself evenly in all skills than picking up a specific skill and master it. This is the reason why my improvement seems slower than other people, but I learn a lot of things and able to do many things independently, without much help in the beginning.

When a problem exists, the first thing I will do is solve it. I cannot let a problem stay unsolved. Before I move on, I have to settle it once and for all, so that I will not have to face the problem again in future. And yes, I am the kind of person who is weak at evade and avoid problems. So when a serious problem comes and I cannot solve it, I will probably hide in a corner to think how to solve it or storm forward and get bruises all over my body.

I am also a person who wants to be well prepared before I start my journey or do something new. I will spend most of my time doing preparation to face any possible problem occur and make sure that I will not fail. Besides that, I am too cautious and thinks too much during the journey. This will definitely slows me down and it also shows that I am not brave enough to take risks.

Yeah, I am not brave enough, well said.

Undeniably, I think money is very important and I want it.

Maybe, I am not caring enough to understand the feelings of people around me, especially those that I care very much.

Honestly, before I starting writing this post, I never expect I can see myself so clearly from a game.

Now that I know what person I am, I was wondering if there is anyone who can change himself to be a better man?

Who are you to define better or worse? There is no right or wrong in real world either!

Life is just like a game, right? It is a hardcore game that does not offer you a second chance to replay.

However, whether it is in game or real life, I guess we do not need to worry too much. Life is just too short to worry too much and do everything perfectly.

I just have to stay happily, that’s all I ask of myself.

What about you?